3 Women Who Changed My Life

By Rob Chrane, Founder and CEO of Down Payment Resource

This Mother’s Day, as I reflect on the course of my life, I’ve realized that the most profound growth hasn’t come from grand events or dramatic shifts, but through the presence and influence of others. In particular, three women come to mind — women who saw me clearly, challenged me with care, and remained steady through time and change. Each impacted me in a different way: one shaped my character, one launched my career, and one became my partner in life. I didn’t always recognize their influences in the moment, but I’ve had enough years — and miles — now to see it clearly and be forever grateful. 

1. My Mother — Tough Love, Lifelong Lessons

My mother was caring, protective and deeply invested in my well-being, but she never let me off easy. She didn’t take crap from me, and I’m grateful for that. She made sure I understood the value of accountability. If I was wallowing in regret, she’d gently (or not so gently) remind me that self-indulgence wasn’t going to fix anything. That kind of tough love didn’t always feel good in the moment, but it became one of the greatest gifts she gave me.

One of the most lasting memories I have of her is tied to a simple, consistent habit: fitness. She had a regular swim regimen, and watching her stick to it quietly impressed me. It wasn’t flashy. It was just her doing what needed to be done, consistently. That stuck with me. When I was a young adult, drifting into a lazy patch and falling out of shape, she noticed and rather than lecture me offered to pay for my first year at the YMCA, as long as I promised to use it.

That one decision set off a ripple effect. I kept my word and showed up. Eventually, I started running with a group of men I met there who became lifelong friends and mentors. And it all traced back to her nudge and her belief that I could (and should) get back on track.

2. A Mentor Who Believed in Me Before I Did

My first professional job was in residential real estate. I was young, unsure of myself, insecure and more than a little immature. I didn’t really believe I had what it took to succeed. Fortunately, someone else did. My first boss, the office broker, somehow saw something in me that I hadn’t yet seen in myself.

I’ll never forget those early days. I mustered up the courage to canvas neighborhoods — literally knocking on doors. It was the dog days of August in Atlanta, hot and sticky as only Atlanta can be. The very first door I knocked on was an elderly woman who had just come home from the hospital, and I’d woken her up from her nap. I was mortified, embarrassed and filled with instant regret. But oddly enough, that moment broke the ice. I figured, if I survived that, everything else would be easier. So I kept going. And somehow, my boss saw that. Whether she felt sorry for me or genuinely recognized a spark of persistence, she decided I was worth investing in. She started trusting me with referrals, such as the occasional listing and even the odd corporate relocation. At the time, it seemed crazy to me. But it also gave me a reason to rise to the occasion. I didn’t want to let her down.

Fifty years later, I still think about what that trust meant to me and how her belief in me paved the way for everything that came after.

3. A Friend Who Reminded Me to Stay True to Myself

This third woman is, quite simply, the love of my life, although we started out as something much simpler: co-workers and casual friends. We met while working for an independent mortgage banker. She was a marketing assistant to a loan officer in the next office over, and her cubicle happened to be right outside my door. We were both single, but this wasn’t a story of sparks flying or dramatic first impressions. We just happened to be two people who worked late and struck up easy, light conversations at the end of the day.

There were no expectations, no pretense. Just an uncomplicated friendship that slowly revealed who she really was: a bright, sociable, deeply capable young woman with a promising future. I didn’t know it then, but those brief exchanges were the beginning of something extraordinary.

Fast forward, and we’ve been together for almost 30 years. Over those decades, I’ve watched her rise to spectacular heights in her career, navigating both triumphs and setbacks with remarkable steadiness. Through it all, she was — and is — solid as a rock. Her calm confidence and resilience didn’t come with speeches or pep talks; it came quietly, by example. That presence — steady, grounded, quietly strong — has been one of the most shaping influences in my life. That kind of support doesn’t always get headlines, but it changes lives. It certainly changed mine.

Full Circle

These three women entered my life at different times, but each left an imprint I carry with me to this day. My mother taught me discipline and accountability. My mentor showed me what it meant to be believed in. And my wife taught me what it looks like to love someone into becoming more fully themselves.

I didn’t know at the time I was being shaped by them. But, looking back, I can say with full clarity they didn’t just influence me — they helped build me.

My hope on this Mother’s Day for each of you is that you take a few minutes to remember the influential women in your own life who believed, who prodded and who smiled proudly for you.